Marben Toronto – overall disappointing, but lots of fun! [ Restaurant Review ]

Blah Blah Blah Part…

When I wrote that this blog will be about everything at all, I haven’t thought that it will be that granular, and I would include my date night experience… But I will

It is cool when you have something to celebrate.. I like to celebrate big and small things, because it makes a day special, and allows to go out and have some fun.

Today I was celebrating my 1000th twitter follower Looks like it is not a big deal, so why not to make a BIG deal out of it ?

To celebrate it, me and Anna decided to go to Marben Toronto. Everyone around was talking how cool it is, how modern it is, how relaxed atmosphere there is… Why not to try right ?

So I took out of the closet my best shirt and went to Marben.

In case you are wondering, here is link to Marben in Urbanspoon:

Marben on Urbanspoon

Marben – Disappointing Part


Marben Toronto has 2 seatings at 6:45 and 9:00. We have made a reservation at 6:45 and arrived sharp.What surprised me that this Saturday night – restaurant was almost empty, only couple of tables was filled with hungry eaters. Pretty strange considering all the hype.. Where are those over-excited “urbanspooners”  and “yelpers” ?


Hostess showed us our table, and disappeared momentarily. After looking around we noticed that it is probably one of the shittiest table in the whole restaurant. It is right near  the kitchen entrance and close to the stairs… Not a problem, we called  our waiter and asked to seat us somewhere else.

Pretty easy task considering that restaurant is empty right ? Wrong.

We tried 2 times, both times hostess blocked us by explaining some gibberish of how overbooked they are (probably overbooked with dust, considering no people around ). This was pretty funny. Usually I would just leave, but considering that at this time finding other spot would be pretty hard… We stayed.

10 minutes passed, restaurant was still empty. One of the only guests arrived was intelligent Asian gentleman who arrived by himself and couple of small groups. Asian gentleman was seated right next to us, which probably surprised him a lot, considering variety of available tables He definitely was more polite than me, so he kept his concerns to himself.


We ordered 12 Oysters. Oysters came with lemon, which is cool, but lemon was sliced so thinly, that it was almost impossible to squeeze it on the oysters. You almost got a feeling that they took this lemon from some other person’s salad, because it definitely was not suited for Oysters

Oysters were tasty and fresh!

Oysters is an amazing French appetizer which usually goes perfect with wine and baguette.

“Can I get some bread ? ” – Anna asked our waiter

“Sorry we don’t have bread, but we have a toast!”  – he answered

YOU DONT HAVE A BREAD ? Marben! Wake Up!

They brought us some toasted bread. Which wasn’t that bad, just weird.

Next, each of us ordered one course – Anna ordered scallops, I have ordered Octopus. After we have finished appetizers, they started bringing in one dish at a time. They thought that we want to share everything, even our main course.Which was so weird, but sounded like a romantic idea…  Why not, right ?



Marben Scallops

Scallops themselves were ok… But combination of scallops and all the other components of the dish (this yellow thingy – they said it is vanilla, but tasted like potatoes.. ) Was so strange.. It is not bad.. It is not good.. It is just strange..

You know what I mean ? The same feeling you get when you drink cherry beer.

Octopus with porchetta :

Marben octopus with porchetta

When you hear combination octopus with porchetta, however you twist it – it sounds strange. The dish was very strange!

Octopus itself was good, porchetta itself was ok… potatoes with vinegar – was pretty bad… Looking at this dish,you feel like you are in the “all you can eat” buffet, and you grab everything there is, just to try…

This dish altogether did not make any sense…

It is like Bruce Jenner becoming a woman… Does not make any sense!

We have finished our meals and I have asked for a green tea with my dessert. I was almost certain that considering they cannot give  you a  piece of bread, getting a green tea won’t be an easy task.

Our waiter kindly asked: ” I am sorry, we don’t have green tea. Are you ok with peach-green tea?”

For every question I had, Marben had their own answer. It is like those nerd kids in school, they always argue with you on everything just to argue..

“Sure we are ok!” – we answered.. Green-peach tea is better than no tea…

Then dessert came.

Chocolate Truffle:

Truffle Marben

Truffle just tasted bad. Nothing to add here Sorry Marben – no points for that one.

Lots of fun Part

Here is the fun part. When food  is “so so”, you start to look around, and sometimes you even start to discuss your neighbours.

When I took a glance at the polite Asian gentleman, I saw that he was done with his food. On his table were 2 pictures – one of a woman and the other of a man. Pictures were tiny, in black and white. He was looking sadly at them.

This made both me and Anna sentimental! We recreated a story in our minds, how poor fella lost his family, and here he is alone in the restaurant, grieving for the lost ones, with no shoulder to cry on. Anna almost shed a tear. We forgot about bad food, about rude hostess we just sit there appreciating that we have each other.

All the sentiments turned into a laugh when we got our bill. Together with bill came this:

Marben Toronto Marry

Those 2 photos on polite’s gentleman table were pictures of Mary and Ben (together they make Marben) . We just got Mary’s picture. Probably Ben’s photo is a special option only for the kind guests!

This is one of those cases when you like your story more, then the reality around you.. It’s like believing in Santa… When you find out that it is your parents sneaking in and putting presents under the Christmas tree… Next time when  they say: “Smoking is bad!”, how can you trust them ?

So why polite Asian gentleman was so sadly looking at these photos and made us believe that he was grieving ? If I would take a guess  –  he was disappointed with food and service.

Overall the night was full of fun. Despite, Marben being a weird experience, we talked, we laughed, we had a wonderful date night


Wow that ended up being a long story


Curious Dreamer, Experimentator addicted to fine Wine and Endurance Sports

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